I remember seeing the commercials when I was a young mom. Rapturously happy mothers diapering their children. The wrinkled brow of concern on the mom in the perfectly ironed nightgown as she delivers cough medicine to her adorable son in the night. And who can forget that squeezable teddy bear who sold bottles and bottles of Snuggle fabric softener? According to him, I’ll practically want to take a bath in that stuff. Don’t even get me started on Mop ‘n Glo.
Now we all know that life is not perfectly diapered, ironed or softened. Psh. Who dreams up these commercials? Come and take a look at my life for a while. That would be a real-life messy adventure. But those companies knew what they were doing. My life wasn’t like their commercials, but they knew that in my weaker moments, I wished it was. So controlled. So ordered. So clean! A little voice in my head asked me why my floor isn’t that clean. How come my kids gag on cough medicine? Come to think of it, I don’t even use fabric softener…
My life was cluttered and a little chaotic. My kitchen floor sported a cloudy, spilled-milk sheen. I’d balance my checkbook while the laundry piled up and the kids keep forgetting where the door jambs were. I mean, I think they forgot. They kept walking into them, what other explanation can there be? And worst of all, Calgon refused to ‘take me away.’
Sometimes, those little commercials made me feel like I was failing. Like I wasn’t doing this mother thing right. The TV children always looked cleaner, were more polite and had permanent smiles stuck to their faces. Fortunately, I never felt that way for long. Soon I’d come to my senses, and realize that all the Supermoms and Superkids lived in the same talking box that the Snuggle Teddy Bear did. They weren’t real.
That aura of TV perfection is a myth. It doesn’t exist. For me, that was a comforting thought. And not only am I not perfect, I’m not attracted to people who either think they are, or pretend they are either. Although I might have fleeting dreams of hanging out with Mr. Clean and Betty Crocker, I don’t look for that in my friends. Not only is perfection intimidating, it’s boring.
Got issues? Got milk…on the floor? Do you have un-perfect kids and laundry out the wazoo? I’ll be right over. Let’s have a cup of, well, whatever you have. I know you didn’t have time to get to the store yet. I’ll take the mug with the cartoon character on it. Wonder Woman belongs on that mug, because she sure doesn’t live at my house.
Please don’t try to hide any messes. You can talk about your problems. That’s what I like about you. If I can do that with you too, I’ve got a feeling that we’ll be friends for a very long time.
Surrounded by the Spirit on Facebook
“Wonder Woman belongs on that mug, because she sure doesn’t live at my house.”…Mine neither! In this TV and social media age, it’s wisdom to remind yourself of what’s reality and what’s not. Great post, Ceil!
Hi Karen! Thank goodness she’s still in the box at your house too!
It probably is a good thing to remind myself from time to time that I’m fine, TV is not real. Especially not like ‘reality tv’ which I sincerely hope is not reality. I didn’t have that when I was a young mom.
I’m so glad you liked the post today! Thank you for your visit. I look forward to getting to know you better
Ceil
I love this, so agree.
Hi Denise! Thank you for your kind words my friend. Both of us can rejoice with another cup of coffee and ignore the cobwebs in the corner for a minute to two…they’ll still be there!
Have a peaceful evening,
Ceil
Amen! Ceil, amen! My saying is “Parden this mess, my home is creating memories!” Whew… I’m so glad I’m not the only mom out there that thinks like that from time to time. I’m me, I’m unique and if you don’t like me, its your loss. (Figurely speaking) We are heading to the mountains for a much needed mini vacation, so once I return, I’ll stop back by. Have a good weekend! Hugs, Amy
Hi Amy! Thank you for having my back here
You are so right. You made your priorities, which are great by the way, and you stand by them. Love that! Enjoy your get away, I’ll miss you, but I’ll look forward to your return.
Safe travels,
Ceil
Yes! We will be best friends I think. This post made me smile. It also made me breathe a little sigh of relief, for sure.
Hi Kathleen! How nice to see you today!
I’m so glad this gave you a reason to smile. I think we must be a little alike
You are not alone! And judging from some of the comments, we are in good company too.
Have a restful night,
Ceil
Hi Mari! I’m past the ‘milk on the floor’ now too, but in my younger days, a clean floor meant someone had to drop a cup. Murphy’s Law I think.
You don’t have to worry about me inspecting your house. Just lead me to your fabulous backyard and we can share some coffee there
Thank you for your visit, and have a good night!
Ceil
Calgon never took me away either!
TV, magazines and all the media has a way of making one feel as if they do not measure up. We can be so hard on ourselves.
Life is short, and the older you get the more you realize that trying to live in a “perfect world” is wasted energy.
Wonderful post Ceil.
Joy to you!
Debbie
Hi Debbie! You are so right, we can be really hard on ourselves. We’re told to be the ‘best we can be’ but we think that means perfect. Not in my world, that’s for sure!
What’s up with Calgon? No truth in advertising, that’s for sure.
Thanks for your visit, it’s always nice to see you
Ceil
Thanks Ceil. No one is perfect and have a perfect life. But with God, we can get through and be happy anyway with all the imperfectness:)
Hi Joy! I like your attitude a lot. No one can say they have it all figured out, so why bother pretending that you do? The key to happiness is accepting what you have and what you can do.
Sounds like that’s what you have done. Perfect!
Have a good day
Ceil
Although I must admit to being organized and enjoying cleaning, my place is far from perfect and I like it just fine this way. I have always despised clutter and feeling fenced in, so as a result of this I have very little furniture…just what I need and I have never been happier.
Less = more.
Hi Linda! Good for you! Accept and enjoy what you have and what you can do. It’s really a good thing to understand what you can tolerate, and if not a lot of furniture makes you peaceful, then go for it!
I like airy rooms myself. I personally don’t have any, but I like it when I see it. The only uncluttered place in my house is my three season room…no wonder I love it so much!
I think your peace and joy say it all. You’re happy with you
Have a good day my friend,
Ceil
I’m not sure that even Tide can help with the *dirty laundry* that I share on my blog. Honesty is the only way I know how to live. And yes, sharing my messy life is freeing. Glad you like imperfection – me too.
Ceil, you are a Wonder-full Woman, so glad you’re my friend!
GOD BLESS!
Hi Sharon! Thank you for your comment, it just warmed my heart my friend. And you go ahead and do the things that make you free. From the looks of it, you have many, many blog friends who care for you and pray for you too. (I am one of them of course!)
I think my middle name is ‘imperfection.’ Well, it might be something else, but maybe I should change it
So happy we are connected through our blogs too. We have been brought together to help each other, and enjoy our time with each other. How great is that??
Have a good day Sharon!
Ceil
Very true! Our lives are not perfect like the media makes us think we should be. We should share our struggles with each other and ask for prayer. Thanks for posting this.
Hi Lauren! You are so right about sharing our struggles. No one should be sitting at home watching TV and feeling bad about ourselves. Thank goodness we have good friends who can support and listen…and set us straight!
Thank you for visiting, it’s always great to see you!
Ceil
I DO know someone who takes a bath in fabric softener. Now she’s only got one wrinkle – the one she sits on.
We bought the latest vaccum cleaner because it was advertised on TV. We didn’t realise we had to actually switch it ON and use it. I’ve now put a notice for visitors to our house saying “Please wipe your feet before leaving this house!”
God bless.
Hi Victor! That must be uncomfortable for her. I don’t like sitting on wrinkles….
You are so funny my friend, you always make me smile! May God bless you with many reasons to smile today
Blessings,
Ceil
Oh, Ceil, this post is one that all young mothers should read. Why do we keep looking in these distorted mirrors when the truth can be found in God’s Word instead. God doesn’t look at outward appearance–whether it is our own, our homes’, or our kids’–He looks at our heart. Thanks for sharing these truths.
Hi Pam! I agree! I did one with a similar theme about a year ago. I really think it’s an important point. I wish someone told me to just calm down and enjoy!
Distorted mirrors…good image. I like that!
Have a great day, enjoy your cat
Ceil
Ceil, I love your writing! The word that stood out to me today was Psh! My grandma (who helped raise me) said that all the time!
I could hug your neck if that was the only word you’d put in the post!
I definitely agree with the idea about TV perfection being a myth. I think also in this day and age Pinterest does the same thing in a more subtle way, if we allow it to. Social media plays a big part in it too.
Yes, we all have problems…I doubt there is anyone who has no messes! You are a blessing!
Dianna xo
Hi Dianna! Thank you for your encouraging comment today, I really appreciate it! How fun that your Grandmother used that phrase! I’m so glad that touched you.
I had to giggle about your Pinterest comment. I do see DIY projects that look incredible…for someone else. I could never do what they do!
Thank you for your comments today. Have a good Thursday!
Ceil
Dear Ceil,
thank you for writing this post. About the commercial stuff I never get annoyed of that stuff but seing things on social medial of friends that I know and they know me too. Through beautiful pictures and posts of what they doing…it seems that they have perfect life and I live in this unfair world.
But it pushed me to learn more that actually our lives not perfect only people who enjoy the good and bad times that called perfect life. And I learn to honor friends in social media who are not in same situation with mine (does it make sense?)
thank you for sharing me this and remind me that I am not the only one
Blessing
Hi Delvalina! Dianna mentioned Pinterest too. There seems to be no end to how we can find reasons to feel inferior. I’m very glad that you realize there really isn’t perfection in this world. Just people who can roll with what they’ve been given, just like you said. I like that!
Oh no. You are not the only one by a longshot
Hugs,
Ceil
I’m on the other end of mothering and there’s plenty of time to do the cleaning. Making a choice to stop trying to be a super woman (or Martha Stewart!) was the best decision I made. I tried the Calgon, too, but it didn’t work for me either! ~Pamela
Hi Pam! You would be the third person to have Calgon let them down. Sigh. Is there no truth in advertising anymore?
I’m on the other end of cleaning too. But what a grace to know as a young mom that I don’t have to be like the commercials. Take me as I am, or I guess you’ll have to move on. It was very empowering.
Nice to see you today!
Ceil
I knew I liked you! Messy and all – me too. I know the expectation of doing it all and comparing myself to Mrs. Clean down the street drove me crazy for awhile. I just had to let go of something and the perfectly cleaned house was it. I am laughing though at the irony that I practically killed myself cleaning before friends arrived two weeks ago – they would have acceptable me less tired and a little bit dusty but no, I had to have things just right. guess I’ve got a long way to go yet….You made me think this afternoon, Ceil. Thanks!
Hi Jeanie! Well, there is something to cleaning as a gift of hospitality. My daughter read this post and told me she decided she won’t clean the house before my next visit…I’ve created a monster! LOL!
But I told her if she didn’t I’d completely understand. I’m sure your friends would’ve too. That’s what friends do. They cut that slack nice and long. And they love us even if we are not Martha Stewart!
I’m glad you had such a great visit with your friends. I bet they loved the time they spent with you!
Blessings,
Ceil
And ain’t that the truth.
;=}
Hugs.
Hi Linda! Well…it is for me!
Hugs right back,
Ceil
“Wonder Woman” doesn’t live at my house, either. Neither does the Pine Sol lady. We manage to get through a “well lived in house”
Hi Cecelia! Good for you! And I’m sure it’s welcoming and loving too. You spend more time making people feel comfortable than worrying about a sterile floor. I like that!
Have a good afternoon
Ceil
Oh, Ceil, we will DEFINITELY be friends for a long time!! I can remember serving friends juice in a lidless sippy cup, cause that was all that was clean at the time. It required frequent refills, but we sure did bond and giggle!
Heart Hugs, Shelly <3
Hi Shelly! Well that’s some good news! I love the story about the sippy cup. I once was at a friends house and she served coffee. It tasted a little funny, but what the heck it’s coffee, right? I got to the bottom and there was a huge fashion ring resting on the bottom of the cup. Um…. I just kept my mouth shut! Maybe I should have told her so we could laugh like you did
Hugs right back!
Ceil
I totally agree that media makes women feel less than perfect. We have to look/act/feel a certain way in order to be “perfect”. I recently saw something that said the “normal” woman in the US wears a size 14, leaning closer to a size 16!!! That made me feel AWESOME!!! 😉
Hi Deb! How beautiful the feet that come to bring the good news! Size 16? Phew!!!! Love that
Now I feel awesome too. Thank you so much!
Blessings,
Ceil
Oh my sweet friend Ceil…you have out-done yourself on this post! Truer words were never spoken…”And not only am I not perfect, I’m not attracted to people who either think they are, or pretend they are either.”…this is my favorite line. From one imperfect friend to another, have a blessed day
Debby
Hi Debby! And I knew we were soul-mates too! I am so glad that you are imperfect, just like me. I think our friendship will last a long time.
Have a restful night!
Ceil
Thanks for this post. Amen and amen – I am right there in the midst of an imperfect, messy life too, trying my best to get through the trials of each day. Thanks be to God His tender mercies to get us over the rough spots we all face in life. Enjoy what’s left of the week.
Hi Deb! I love your comment! Aren’t we all doing the same thing? Trying to meet God’s challenges and blessings the best way we know how? I agree with the mercies too, I couldn’t do anything without him…
Have a restful night
Ceil
I use to fall for all it…felt poorly about myself. as I failed miserably and was pooped all the time…thankfully the Lord opened my eyes and I made some changes and made my life simpler and happier and my family was happier.
Hi Dee! Yep, I understand completely. It’s so exhausting, and why do we do this to ourselves? I am so happy that God brought you to your happier place, just like he did for me.
Blessings to you my friend,
Ceil
Oh, AMEN! My life is not perfect, either. I like it that way, I like to keep it real, and I like other people who keep it real, too.
So many of God’s blessings grow as fruit of that realness and honesty with one another!
Hi Anne! ‘Keep it real.’ Now that’s the core of the post. Let’s just all be who we are and be okay with that. I might not be perfect, but I’m fine!’
And you are so right. Being honest with each other means we’ll never have to cover our tracks over a lie, or doubt either. Sounds wonderful…
Have a great night Anne! Thank you for your Facebook love too
Ceil
That wonder woman lives in fantasy island, not in the real world! we need to somehow stand up to the media hypes feeding the masses with false hopes. It needs to be said. Great post! Thank you my friend for using your voice! Blessings on you day
Hi Shade! Thank you for your kind words about the post. We all live in the ‘real world’ and have to remember that real is a good thing!
Thank you for your visit, and thank you for the Facebook love too
Ceil
Ceil,
I grinned at your line about the mug with the cartoon face, and the welcome spirit of hospitality that flooded from that line. Yes, (nodding) me too.
Re your comment on my post “Where to Turn When Life Tumbles and Scrawls Red,” thank you, Ceil! We’d love to be on that prayer list, and are so thankful for the prayer cover we are feeling from friends and family already. God did a neat thing just this morning in getting the sedation crew set up for my son’s MRI, after it looked like it would fall through.
Blessings to you and your family this week too,
Thank you,
Jennifer Dougan
http://www.jenniferdougan.com
Hi Jennifer! What great news! I’m so happy that it worked out. And of course I’d be honored to pray for you and your son. That’s what we are all here for…
Hugs,
Ceil
Love this Ceil! I’m always forthcoming with my shortcomings and I’m getting a lot better at not measuring myself against anything or anyone. A dear blogging friend recently shared with me a speech she gave at a women’s retreat and she gave the powerful reminder of the danger of looking at others and comparing. What we measured ourselves against in this world will only lead to hardship.
Thanks for sharing!
Wishing you a blessed weekend.
xoxo
Hi Jennifer! Good for you! I want to be more like you.
Your blog friend sounds like she really has a handle on comparing. It’s so important for us to value who we truly are. Not who anyone else is. We are unique and wonderful, just because God made us.
You have a great weekend too!
Ceil
This was so wonderful and true to life. I’m laughing though—I thought I was the only one who remembered those Calgon commercials!!
Hi Marcia! Oh my no, I remember those commercials and the woman’s frustrated cry: “Calgon! Take me away!” Of course, it never did. Harumpf.
I’m so glad you liked the post. It’s sort of down your alley, isn’t it?
Have a great weekend!
Ceil